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Category: Random Safari Express

The Random Safari Express, a serial feature column by senior UVI Communication student and humorist Carlos Eton, celebrates comedy, philosophy, and the thousand (often ridiculous) random thoughts that pop into our heads during the quiet moments of our day.

It goes without saying that the opinions and ideas expressed in this column are those of the contributing columnist and do not in any way reflect those of The University of the Virgin Islands, the UVI Communication Unit, The USVI, humankind, or humanoid and non-humanoid residents of the Terran solar system.

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Vroom! Vroom!

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Clearly, they need our help.  Big time! So let’s give it to them.  Quickly! 

Random Safari Express

Uhm … Happy Birthday To Mickey Mouse?

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By Carlos Eton

Why do weird things (really weird things) happen on Thursdays.

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It’s Not You; It’s Me

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By Carlos Eton

“Please know, it’s not you … it’s me. I hope we can still be friends though.”

Random Safari Express

What We’ve Learned From Movies and TV, Part 1

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By Carlos Eton

Well, if art does imitate life, then everything I see in movies and television must be true.  Hmm.

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I’d Like To Thank The Academy

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By Carlos Eton

Even crazier … who would actually give someone an award for a random display of random thoughts?

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Listen To Granny, Darn It!

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By Carlos Eton

Granny does have something to tell us. We really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really should listen to what she has to say.

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Register 51 Revisited

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By Carlos Eton.

But Register 4 just aggravated my checkout trauma. The customer at the front of this line insisted on paying for his bottle of Wino’s Pride with change. Dimes! “Are you freakin’ kidding me?” I grumbled. “I guess I better try another register.”

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A Different Kind Of Panic

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By Carlos Eton.

It makes you wonder … what were they thinking when they wrote that?

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It Is What It Is

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By Carlos Eton.

Granny turned to me and said, “You know, silence is golden, which explains why so many people are poor.”

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Will He Get A Ticket?

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By Carlos Eton

He took a sip and grunted softly.  He knew what he needed to do right now.  No hesitation, no trepidation.  Just do it.

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