Feature, Random Safari Express

Will He Get A Ticket?

By Carlos Eton

It had been a warm rainy night but right now the citizens of Pixieville were being treated to the post-rain quiet that graces the now slippery wet one-way Cameron Street.  The crispness of the moist air was a most welcome relief after two arid, rainless weeks.

Truck driver Brock Lee was tired and just wanted to get home.  He was almost there.  He chose to go the wrong way down Cameron Street, blissfully unaware of the police cruiser.

From his patrol car, Officer Mason Jarre observed the tired truck driver.  Officer Jarre was almost fundamentalist in his approach to law and order–at that time he held the county record for traffic violation citations given by a single officer in a year.  His record of  three hundred and forty had remained unchallenged for almost a decade.  He rarely gave a break to traffic violators.  He was a stickler for the law and the legal system.

Officer Jarre took a swig from his lukewarm latte, yawned a cavernous yawn and adjusted the rear-view mirror of his newly issued Ford Explorer.  Even though he knew that the new car smell was probably caused by semi-toxic chemicals, the scent still made him smile.  He then focused his gaze onto the truck driver who was still traveling the wrong way down the slippery one-way street.

He knew what he needed to do right now. No hesitation, no trepidation.  Just do it.

Jarre knew the law:  forwards and backwards.  He consistently enforced the law to the letter and had received several recognition awards for this dedication to the principles of law enforcement.   He had just passed the sergeant’s exam—he got a 97%–and was just waiting for the promotion to be officially certified.

He took a sip and grunted softly.  He knew what he needed to do right now.  No hesitation, no trepidation.  Just do it.

He smiled and waved at the truck driver, took another sip of his coffee, and let the truck driver continue his wrong-way trek.

Why didn’t the legally perfectionist Officer Jarre do anything?

Why did he not ticket the truck driver who was witnessed going the wrong way down a one-way street?

Drumroll, please!


Because the truck driver was walking!



The Random Safari Express, a serial feature column by senior UVI Communication student and humorist Carlos Eton, celebrates comedy, philosophy, and the thousand (often ridiculous) random thoughts that pop into our heads during the quiet moments of our day.

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